Wednesday, October 3, 2007

Solomon Ortiz is operating with increasing bravado in Cameron County. "How much did he pocket on the $21 million heist at the port?"


Ernesto "La Gallina" Gomez, the man who would be queen, and Ricardo "El Estudiante" Longoria, the man who is a pawn, consummated their dirty act by replacing Cris "!Aguas!" Valadez with Manny "Mugrero" Vasquez on the PUB board. The Treacherous Trio of "Boozin'" Bill Hudson, Renato "Blackie" Cardenas and Neil "Syphilis" Simmons applauded the action as they don't want their impact fees raised from $300 to $3,000, the developers enamoured with the sweetheart deal that has provided them with $40 million in profits at the expense of the utility company's ratepayers. Vasquez recently resigned in disgrace from the Brownsville Housing Authority when his suspicious activities compromised the entity's reputation, his underhanded antics, nevertheless, catching the attention of the insiders who need Ernie Hernandez clones to facilitate the shady transactions that enrich the few and cost the many. "This is a sad day for the common man," said Father Jesus P. Cadissimo. "Our council has sinned against the community again. Vasquez is a willing tool content in his role of playing the fool." Vasquez is part of Congressman Solomon "I Gave Bill My Culo But I Really Wanted Hillary's Cunt" Ortiz's machine. Repudiated by the Corpus Christi Caller on numerous occasions for his unethical conduct, Ortiz is operating with increasing bravado in Cameron County since The Brownsville Herald chooses to ignore his antics. "How much did he pocket on the $21 million heist at the port?" asked Cadissimo. "He is convinced that we're nothing but pendejos and he is going to plunder us." Lencho "Labios" Rendon, Ortiz's former aide and longtime henchman who resigned from the congressman's office when his dealings were attracting excessive scrutiny, has descended upon Brownsville like a vulture who has spotted fresh carrion. "God works in mysterious ways," continued Cadissimo. "He knew that Rendon would be reaching into everyone's pockets, so he punished him with the birth defect of shorter arms. His life has been a living purgatory because he can't masturbate, but that hasn't stopped him from screwing the border's denizens. Like other felons, he has returned to the scene of the crime. He figures that he can match his take on the $21 million port sting by monopolizing the lobblying contracts of the public entities. Why have we let this fox back into the chicken coop? Our politicians must rest easily at night knowing that we're a stupid people."